What will hold us together
by hwhitty10
Summary: After the storm. After the fight. After everything - what will hold them together when it all falls apart?
1. Chapter 1

_It's been two weeks since the storm…The morning sun now rises over Seattle. As one tiny ray of light creeps into apartment 502._

_ Arizona is feeding Sofia breakfast. As she airplanes a spoonful into daughter, Callie enters the apartment making a beeline to her daughter and avoiding any eye contact with her wife. She gives her daughter a quick kiss on the head and runs her finders through her hair. _

Callie: Bye sweetie, I'll see you later on today, okay?

Arizona: You're working today?

_Callie fiddles with some mail on the table, still not looking at her. _

Callie: (_flatly_) I'll get the rest of the my stuff later to bring over Marks and Sofia's with me tonight, so I'll need the crib too.

Arizona: Callie..

Callie: I'm going to call Colleen, Richard's funeral is at 1 tomorrow and I assume you'll be there so we'll need a babysitter.

_Callie starts to tear up, she can't always pinpoint for what reason, for crying seems as natural as blinking to her for the last two weeks it's all she done, but saying Richards name is what has cracked her this morning. _

Arizona: Callie…

Callie: What? (_she snaps back_) Am I not allowed to be upset over Richard? Because I wasn't in the operating room when he coded? Am I not allowed to feel anything about this too?

Arizona: That's not what..

_Sofia smacks her hand down and knocks over the bowl of food. Splatting it all over the floor and all over her face. _

Arizona: uh oh, what happened little miss?

_Arizona goes to grab a paper towel, as Callie kisses her daughter and heads out the door. _

_ Arizona turns around to find that Callie is gone. Sadly she sulks back over to Sofia and wipes her face. _

Arizona: What a mess, huh? (to herself) It's all just one big mess.

**Hospital **

_The hospital is still in mourning for Dr. Richard Webber. The doctors and nurses are going through the motions today, just getting in and doing what they can, but no one can shake the feeling that something is missing. Someone is missing. _

_Callie is going over her charts trying to get her head in the game, but a man's voice breaks her concentration._

Man voice: Things fall apart …but we can find a way to hold it all together.

_Callie looks up to lock eyes with a tall, handsome man, with deep brown eyes. He's got a sexy scruff to him and right now he's flashing a rather charming yet confident little smirk and smile_.

Callie: Excuse me?

_He extends his hand to introduce himself. _

Michael: Sorry, Michael. Michael Parker. General Surgery. And I loved your TED speech, cartilage from scratch, it's amazing. You really blew me away.

Callie: Oh, right. Well thanks. It's nice to meet you.

_Callie shuts the chart and starts walking away, as Michael catches up quickly to walk with her._

Michael: I get it. I'm the one the no one wants here. Because if I'm here, it's just a reminder that he's not. Dr. Webber meant everything to you guys and I'm not trying to fill a void. I'm just here to do my job.

Callie: Dr. Parker.

Michael: Please, call me Michael.

Callie: Michael, I don't envy your position. I know how hard it must be and I'm not trying to brush you off. It's just been, well the hardest two weeks of my life and you seem really nice and really well, (_she gives him a little look up in down, taking in his striking good looks_) you're not going to have a hard time finding friends here. I'm just not in a very friendly place right now.

Michael: Got it. However, we do have to work together and I could really use you on this case I got.

Callie: What do you got?

Michael: Car accident, woman suffering from smashed pelvis and two dislocated shoulders and a smashed up wrist. You want in? Meet me in OR 2 in about twenty minuets.

Callie: See you there.

**OR 2**

_Callie and Michael and working seamlessly together in the operating room, they have shared a few nods and looks over the course of the procedure, but mostly been pretty quiet, yet Callie still can't suppress all of her feelings, she tries to focus on the task at hand and shake off any linger emotions that she still has swelling inside of her about Arizona and everything else until the surgery is done. _

Michael: You weren't impressed, huh?

Callie: What?

Michael: That I could quote you. I've never been able to do that to someone.

Callie: Well, I'm flattered. Thank you.

Michael: It's a shame you're married, would have been one hell of a pick up line.

_Callie drops one her tools. Marriage is now on the table and she can't bare to talk about it let alone think about it. _

Michael: Dr. Torres? You okay? I didn't mean any disrespect, I was just making a joke.

Callie: No, I know. It's fine.

Michael: She's a lucky lady. Your wife. She's a doctor here as well. Dr. Robbins, right?

_Callie drops her tools again, but this time on purpose, because she can't hold in her rage right now, she's unleashing it and she doesn't care who hears it. _

Callie: She cheated on me! My lucky lady cheated on me! Right in this hospital in fact, right down the hall in some on-call room. Yeah. After months of getting through the plane crash, surviving one disaster after another. Oh and don't forget about the leg! The damn leg! The leg that you might as well beat me over the head with, because its apparently the root of all of it. The reason she slept with another woman, it's the reason I'm never going to be what she wants or what she needs. I'm never going to be enough, because I cut if off!

Michael: Dr. Torres.!

_Callie stops her rant and is stunned silent by the yell. Michael sees that he got her attention and now speaks softer but still with authority. _

Michael: I'm going to ask to step aside take a minute and let Dr. Ross here take over. Okay?

_Callie tries to keep her wits about her and shake herself together. _

Callie: No, I'm fine I got this.

Michael: Dr. Torres you're going to step aide. Take a minute. Now!

_Callie admits defeat and leaves the OR room. _

**Scrub Room**

_Michael is scrubbing down from surgery as Callie enters the room._

Callie: Dr. Parker I'm so sorry, I lost it in there and it wasn't professional and I shouldn't have said any of those things out loud to you or to anyone, especially… and now I'm just … I'm so sorry.

Michael: Dr. Torres, I understand. More than you know. And we all need to take a minute sometimes. I'm sure it won't happen again.

Callie: No it won't. Thank you, Dr. Parker.

Michael: It's Michael. And Callie…Can I call you Callie or..

Callie: Yeah of course, Callie is fine.

Michael: Callie, you may not be in a friendly place right now, but I'm good listener and over a few drinks you may even find that I make for a pretty good friend when someone needs me to be one. So think about it.

_He brushes her shoulder a little and throws her a friendly wink as she leaves. _

_Callie manages to smile as he leaves. A smile, she forgot her face could form those._

Apartment 502

_Arizona is in Sophia's room looking at the picture that Mark had taken of both Callie and herself holding little Sofia. As she sets the picture down, Callie enters the room. They share a look, both surprised to see each other, but at the same time feeling hopeful? Feeling scared? Lonely, Loved? It's confusing and heartbreaking, it's a thousand things that they can't make sense of with blank stares at each other. _

Callie: Sorry, I just forgot the monitor.

_Arizona reaches for the monitor and turns it on, as we her a snoring Sofia coming through it, she hands it over to Callie. _

Arizona: For a little girl, she's got quite a snore on her, huh.

Callie: Yeah.

_Callie turns to leave, but Arizona grabs her arms to stop her. _

Arizona: Callie… at some point you and I need to talk. I don't want it to be this way.

_Arizona is trying for a soft and civil approach and that just pisses Callie right off! _

Callie: You think this is what I want? You think I want to live across the hall in Marks apartment? You think I want to divide my time with my daughter with you? A woman who never even wanted a child, who should have –

Arizona: Sofia means everything to me, you know that. How dare you -

Callie: How dare I? How dare I? How dare you, Arizona! How dare you use your leg and the plane crash as justification for sleeping with another woman. How dare you try to make me feel guilty for any moment that I grieved over the loss of my best friend and for nights I worried about you. How dare you make a mockery of our marriage. A marriage I fought for, a marriage I thought could survive anything.

Arizona: You don't understand, Callie. You're not even trying to understand.

Callie: Understand what? That she made you feel like you again, she made you feel things that I never could. I understand. I understand why people cheat. This isn't my first lesson in heartbreak or infidelity. But at least George wasn't a coward; he didn't make me feel like I led him to cheating, like somehow it was my fault.

Arizona: It wasn't your fault. I did it. I don't know how to explain to you exactly why I did it, but until you know what it's like to be me, you wouldn't understand.

Callie: To be you? Who the hell are you, Arizona?

Arizona: That's what I'm trying to say.. I don't know who that is anymore. I haven't for a while and I kept trying to maintain this persona, this person who everyone thinks I should be, I was holding it all together and just hoping that one day I'd feel like me again, but I don't. I don't know how to get back to the person I was.

Callie: What I am supposed to do? Forgive you? Just take it, like I have taken everything else for the last four months? Allow you to keep hurting me and just hope one day it will all just get better and you'll love me again? I can't do that. I don't deserve that.

Arizona: No, I know, I just ..

Callie: I don't have the warrior wounds as you call them from the crash. But I got battle scars of my own. But unlike you, I'm not going to let them define me or hold me back. I loved you Arizona. I fought for you and I lost you. But I'm going to walk tall, because I did everything I could.

Arizona: I know you did, but you also took something from me that I can never get back. And I wish I could stop looking at you and blaming you.

Callie: Well, maybe this will make it easier.

_Callie takes off her ring and necklace and leaves them behind as she leaves the door and the apartment in a blink of eye. _

**The Archfeild Hotel**

_Arizona knocks on a hotel door as Lauren opens it up. _

Lauren: I didn't think you got my messages.

Arizona: I didn't know you'd still be here.

Lauren: I wanted to stay and pay my respect to Richard tomorrow. You want to come in?

_Arizona hangs her head, she doesn't know anything. _

Arizona: I don't know.

Lauren: You just going to hang in the hall all night?

Arizona: I don't know.

Lauren: Arizona…

_Arizona grabs Lauren and kisses her hard as they fall back into the hotel room and let the door shut behind them. _

**Morning.**

_Arizona wakes up in bed with Lauren. She feels nothing. Empty. Cold. She takes a deep breath in as she removes Lauren arm from her waist and goes to sit up. Her cell phone rings… it's Callie._

Arizona: Hey.

Callie: Look I don't mean to call you, I just can't find Sofia's teddy, she's screaming for it and I thought you might know where it is, Colleen's here and she can't find it either so…

Arizona: It's the bedroom, should be by the hamper, I had to wash it after she got dinner on it the other night.

_Lauren is now awake and turns over to her moaning a "good morning". It's soft but loud enough for Callie to hear it and she closes her eyes in pain at the words being whispered over the phone. _

Lauren: Mmm.. want some coffee?

_Arizona tries to sush her up, but it's too late. She knows Callie heard her._

Arizona: Callie, it's not what- -

Callie: Yeah okay. Got it.

_Callie hangs up and closes her eyes again and then spots the Teddy, she takes a deep breath in, trying to get her emotions together, she grabs the teddy bear and holds her head up high out of the apartment and towards her still screaming daughter. _

**Funeral – Day **

_Everyone is gathered around the gravesite as a prayer is being read by Minister. Meredith is being held by Derek. Christina is holding it together as she shares a soft look with Owen. April is with her fiancé while Avery is holding Stephanie. _

_Everyone is trying to hold back tears and cries, but can't. _

_Callie has her head down as Arizona watches her from a distance next to her is Lauren who is rubbing Arizona's back as she cries softly. Callie looks up and sees Arizona step away from Lauren touch. They lock eyes and the emotion is too much for Callie she breaks down. With no one to turn to, she tries to hold herself up and then a strong arm surrounds her, she looks up and sees Dr. Michael Parker, she lets him envelop her as she cries harder into him. _

**The Sheppard House **

_Meredith and Derek have invited everyone over after the Funeral. Everyone is inside, talking softly and picking at food and having a few glasses of wine. _

_Callie sits alone on the couch with her thoughts. Suddenly, a glass of red wine is being handed to her. For a moment she thinks she'll look up and she her wife's face, who else would know her choice of poison. _

Michael: You seem like a red wine kind of woman. Although you also seem like a person who would drink just about anything right now.

Callie: You're right on both accounts. Thank you and sorry about earlier I didn't mean to turn your suit into a wet blanket.

Michael: It's stain resistant, so you could throw that wine on me and I'd still be good.

Callie: Stylish and Practical, that's some suit.

Michael: And that's some dress. However, it appears you could use some stain resistance. (_He motions to the side of her dress_) Look likes some kind of… peanut butter?

Callie: Oh. I'm a mess. My daughter felt the need to attack me with her PB&J this morning when I couldn't find her Teddy Bear.

_Michael takes out a napkin from his lapel and lets Callie use it to wipe off the stain. _

Michael: How old?

Callie: Almost three.

Michael: That's a fun age.

Callie: You have kids?

Michael: Um, no. No, I just have alot nieces and let's just say I've been served a few lunches to the face in my day.

_Callie smiles as she then takes in the room around her. She sees Meredith with Christina and Derek talking to Owen and Jackson. _

_She's searching for Arizona who at the moment is standing with Alex and Jo, they're talking but it's clear Arizona is not listening. _

_For a second Callie feels the urge to get up and go to her. Arizona and Callie lock eyes, they stare into each other saying everything and nothing at all, its all just..too much again, so Callie turns back to Michael. _

Callie: You want to get out of here? I could use something a little stronger than wine right now.

Michael: Sure.

_Callie and Michael get up and leave. Lauren now walks over to Arizona. _

Lauren: How you holding up?

Arizona: I'm okay. I'm ready to go though.

Lauren: Alright, I'll go pull up my car, we have a few more hours until my flight leaves.

Arizona: Actually, I just need to be alone. Could you just drop me at my place?

Lauren: Yeah, if that what you want.

Tbc…..

Shall I continue?


	2. Chapter 2

**Joe's Bar**

_Callie and Michael have already had a few, Callie is now unloading on him._

Callie:What is it about me, huh? Is there something about me that is just a magnet for marrying people who cheat on me? Do I deserve it? What am I doing wrong?

Michael: Nothing. I know this isn't going to help matters, but the cheating? It doesn't have anything to do with you. It's them. It doesn't mean they don't love you. It doesn't mean they wanted to hurt you, they were just caught up in themselves, they were being selfish and feeding into a desire that they thought would fill a void in them.

Callie: I knew George loved Izzie, I knew he loved her when I married him, but I thought …I thought wrong. And..Arizona, she never wanted to be with a "newborn" but..

Michael: A newborn?

Callie: I was only with one other woman before Arizona and apparently in the lesbian world that makes me a newborn. And she didn't want that, she wanted someone more experienced. A Lauren. She wanted a Lauren! She was with her you know? Again, this morning! How? Why would she do that to me again?

Callie: I don't know. Maybe she just needed to..

Callie: It's Africa!

Michael: What?

Callie: It's Africa all over again. She wanted Africa, she wanted it. Hell, she won it. And then she left me in the Airport. And then she came back for me. Because Africa didn't have me and she wanted me again, but me and Mark had, well… Sofia and I was with child, a child she wasn't sure she was ready to have, but she stayed with me, she picked me! She was all in or so I thought…

Michael: And hang on Mark, your friend who passed away? He's Sofia's father?

Callie: Yeah. Mark. You two would have got along, actually you kind of remind me of him. He was my constant. My rock. The one person who never left me, who never hurt me. Who loved me more than I think anyone else ever did. I miss him so much.

Michael: So what would Mark say about all of this? What would he tell you to do about Arizona?

Callie: Well, Mark had been a part of many cheating scandals in his day, he would say follow my heart. He's say walk tall Torres, you fought, you loved, you lost. Walk Tall. Be brave enough to get back out there.

Michael: Sound like some good advice.

Callie: I don't want to get back out there. I want her. I want my wife back. I want my life back. I haven't stop loving her. I'm so unbelievable mad at her, I'm so hurt, but I never will stop loving her. She's ..there. The Arizona I feel in love with is there, I've seen it, I've felt it, she's just …I don't know. I don't anymore, but I don't want get back out there. I've been out there, I want to be home with my wife and my daughter.

Michael: I wanted that. I wanted to be Dad so much it hurt. My wife and I we'd been trying for a baby since the moment we said " I do"…she suffered a miscarriage and then we got pregnant again soon after and then well, she was far along this time, so much so we had names picked out and walls painted, crib bought. And then, we lost it. And I lost her.

Callie: Michael, I'm so sorry. I didn't..

Michael: No, I saying this because I know what it's like to lose someone while they're right in front of you. She would look at me sometimes and I could just tell, she didn't see me as her Husband anymore, her better half. She would look at me and all she could see was what she didn't have, what she lost. I was the punching bag, I was the reason it hurt, the reason she wasn't being called Mommy. She wouldn't let me touch her, she couldn't handle the thought of something else being taken away. We spent months trying to get back to what we were, but it'd had gone too far, she had sunk too deep and I couldn't pull her out.

Callie: Where is she now?

Michael: She's back in Boston. She's a surgeon as well. She found herself some other guy, a guy that finally could give her what she wanted. A baby. A beautiful baby girl. She's about one years old now.

Callie: Oh god, how do you.. how are you able to..

Michael: I didn't fight. I didn't fight for her. I let her slip away. I let the pain get bigger than our love.

Callie: I fought, Michael. I stood by her every second after the crash, I took all the hits and the pain and the blame. She blames me for all of it. I can't fight that anymore. No matter how much I want to. I don't think I have any fight left in me. And now, with what she did and yeah, maybe it was to fill a void, but that void should have been filled by me or by her daughter, by all the things she still does have.

Michael: Maybe she couldn't see that. We tend to not see what's right in front of us when it's clouded by pain. Maybe with you gone for a little while, when she doesn't have you to blame anymore, then maybe she'll realize what she has or had.

Callie: And where does that leave me?

Michael: Here. It leaves you here. Making a new friend. Who is here to tell you that you Callie Torres are not a magnet for pain or cheating. You are a person who finds the best in people. Who sees them when they don't see themselves. Who fights, who loves and win or lose who still walks tall.

_He raises his glass and they both cheers, Callie wipes a few remaining tears from her eyes and takes the last swig of her drink. _

Callie: Thank you. I can't thank you enough for today and tonight.. I just. Thank you.

Michael: And thank you. Because you did say you were paying, right?

Callie: Ha! Right.

**Apartment 502**

_Arizona sits on the sofa with the TV off, just gazing into the empty room, holding a half full glass of wine – Suddenly she hears keys jingle and the door swing open. _

Callie: Where's sofia? She's here?

Arizona: Callie.. yes, she's here. She's sleeping. I came home early and sent Colleen home. She's fine.

Callie: She's with me tonight.

_Callie goes to head into Sophia's room_.

Arizona: What? Callie she is sleeping, you're not going to wake her up! I made some dinner and saved a plate for you, why don't you just eat something and we can…

Callie: What is this? Why are you even home? I thought you'd be with…

Arizona: Lauren left for New York tonight. She's gone.

Callie: Oh so you're little girlfriend left and now you want to play Mommy and wife again? That's what happening here?

Arizona: She's not my girlfriend! She's …she's nothing, okay?

Callie: She wasn't nothing this morning!

Arizona: I didn't..we didn't sleep together. I went over there to talk and we almost did, but we didn't. I stopped it. I just slept there and tonight I ended it with her. I told her that I couldn't, It didn't feel right, Callie. None of it felt right.

Callie: Is that supposed to make me feel better? Hmm? So you almost slept with her again, that's supposed to make me what? Happy? Elated, that my wife finally stopped cheating on me because she realized it's just didn't feel good anymore?

_Arizona starts to break, sobbing quietly at first, but it's only a matter of time before it all comes out… _

Arizona: Please Callie, today has been, horrible. And I just wanted to be with my daughter and come back here and try to talk to you..

Callie: What makes you think I want to talk to you?

Arizona: Fine. Don't talk. We don't have to talk, but could you just sit with me for minute. And just be here for a second. Richard's gone and Mark's gone and I …I' m gone.. I'm not here. I don't feel here. I can't make sense of anything. But I know that when I'm with Sofia and when I'm near you, I feel like I'm somewhere I belong, even if it's a mess. I…please, Callie.

_Arizona is breaking down, and it's hard to watch. She's crying so hard that her words are barely understandable, but Callie understands. She's still mad as hell and confused and everything, but she gets it. She wanted to feel that sense of belonging all day. She wanted nothing more than to come home and be with her wife and daughter and although it is a mess, right now the mess, the pain, the hurt, it actually feels so familiar now, that in a way it sadly feels like home. _

_Callie walks over the couch that Arizona is on. Arizona moves the blanket over making room for Callie, as she had done months ago when they sat in silence watching American Bake Off. _

_Callie sits down and crosses her legs and looks now into the blank screen in front of them as Arizona is still crying … Callie lets her emotions release now too. Both women are crying, letting the tears fill the silence of the room. _

**Morning**

_The morning sun shines into the apartment. On the couch both women find themselves curled up into each other. After a night tears and sobs, they had fallen asleep and out of habit? Out of instinc? Or maybe out of need, they intertwined themselves together in the night. Callie is the first to open her eyes, feeling Arizona's arms around her, a part of her wants to drift back to sleep and let her wife hold her a little longer, but those arms where recently around another woman and that thought makes her immediately remove her body from what once was her safe place. Arizona wakes up to the swift and abrupt movements of Callie. _

Arizona: Um, sorry. We must have feel asleep. I didn't mean to…

_Arizona scurries over the other side of couch, leaving a large gap between both women. _

_Callie rubs her eyes and arches her back. _

Callie: I hate this couch.

Arizona: It wasn't too bad.

Callie: Yeah, you didn't sleep on it for months.

_Just then they hear Sofia waking through the monitor. _

_Callie:_ I'll go get her up.

_Callie goes to stand and puts her shoes back on…_

Arizona: Callie, thank you for staying last night with me.. I..

Callie: It's not going to happen again. I can't do this Arizona. I can't just sit in this pain with you and we can't just pretend for a night that we are something we're not.

Arizona: I know. I'm not asking for you to do that. I need help, Callie.

Callie: I can't help you Arizona. I won't stand by and let you keep hurting me. I can't do that to myself.

Arizona: I know. I know. Which is why I'm going to make an appointment with Dr. Weston when I get the hospital today.

Callie: The psychologist?

Arizona: I had made an appointment with her a while back after the crash, I didn't go. I wasn't ready. But I'm ready now. I need help and maybe it will… or maybe it won't.. but I need to try something because I don't want to keep hurting you. Callie, believe me, I don't want to hurt you anymore. I don't want to hurt and maybe this will help.

_Callie is taken back a little by this and responds with the only thing she is sure of. _

Callie: I'm going to take Sofia and she's going to stay with me a majority of the time, because she needs consistency and you need to figure out what you're doing and then we can figure out a better schedule, but until then..

_Callie just shrugs, but she really doesn't know. _

Arizona: Okay.

_Callie goes to head into Sofia's room, but stops and turns back around to Arizona. _

Callie: I don't know how to do this, Arizona. I don't know..

Arizona: Me either.

Callie: Just do me a favor; don't go to therapy for us. Go for you, because I'm not sure there is an "us". Outside of being parents, I don't know if we can be anything else to each other anymore.


	3. Chapter 3

_It's been three weeks since the night they unloaded tears on each other and fell asleep on the couch together. Three weeks of minimal conversation. Conversation that consisted only of things revolving around Sofia. Three weeks of sleepless night for both of them, nights they both were tempted to walk across the hall and slip into each others arms and hope to wake up together and realize it had all been just a bad dream. _

_But it wasn't a dream. It was real. This was reality and it hit them everyday. Every time Callie felt naked not putting on her necklace or ring before heading off to work. It sunk in every morning when she didn't have another person around helping her get Sofia ready for the day. _

_Arizona forgot how much she leaned on Callie, nights she needed her to calm her down after waking up in the middle night from her phantom pains. Mornings without waking up to find her wife dancing around in the kitchen making breakfast…and then it would really hit Arizona when she would realize that she actually couldn't remember the last time Callie danced around the kitchen cooking, she had to strain to remember the last good morning they had. After the crash, mornings had been more of a monotonous routine than a free-style dance with them._

_ Arizona would always make sure to be up an hour earlier than Callie, she needed more time in the morning, she couldn't afford anymore the luxury of just being able to rush out of the house. She couldn't risk getting paged earlier than her call time, because she wouldn't be able to just jump out of bed and go running to the hospital. Everything had to be planned and every plan had to have a back plan for the plan and that thought, that thought would lead to most morning showers where Arizona couldn't distinguish if it was the water from the shower head or the tears from her eyes that were soaking her skin. _

_Therapy was making her realize these things and many others. Arizona was realizing that ever since the crash, she had to be in control of planning every minute of her day. She had to allow extra time for simple tasks that she wouldn't have thought twice about before. And all that extra time allotted, it just made her realize what she could no longer do, what she no longer had the freedom to do anymore._

_Mornings when her leg was too sore for words and she would be fumbling in the bathroom trying to do her hair while balancing on one foot and then hearing her wife and daughter in the background laughing …she was missing out on those moments, and it made her mad, and angry, and it made her feel like she was being cheated out of her own life, it made her feel teased all the time, that life was within her reach but she was always going to be two steps behind it. And so those moments when her wife would help her, when she would try to make things easier for her, it felt like she was being taunted or pitied. _

_But for Arizona, this morning, when there was no laughter in the background as she was getting ready, when there was no one waiting for her to hurry up and get out of the bathroom, when breakfast wasn't getting cold because no one was making it…she realized that she wasn't two steps behind her life anymore, she was miles and miles away from it and this time the leg wasn't the reason. _

_Callie finally got Sofia fed and dressed and she was bustling out the door into the hallway, just at the same time Arizona stepped out of her apartment. Sofia instantly brightens at the sight of the blonde. _

Arizona: Hi, big girl. Morning sweetie.

_Callie can't help but notice how Sofia instantly reaches out for her. So Callie moves closer to Arizona for her to take the little one into her arms. _

Arizona: And look at you! That's a pretty little dress for a pretty little lady.

Callie: Yeah, well, pretty little lady here wanted no part of it about twenty minuets ago. I'm already running about a half hour behind.

Arizona: I thought you had today off?

Callie: Surgery from last night got pushed back to today, so…

Arizona: Oh…

Callie: And I thought you weren't due into the hospital until tonight?

Arizona: Um, yeah. I have an appointment with Dr. Weston.

Callie: Oh…

_They continue the awkward walk into the elevator. In these awkward moments of silence Sofia is great as the focus point for both of them. When they have nothing to say or don't know what to say they just make faces and eyes at their daughter._

_As the elevator reaches the lobby floor it dawns on Callie that Arizona doesn't drive. Can't drive. In three weeks they haven't dealt with this issue or it hasn't really come up yet. Callie was always the driver to the hospital for her and today it was raining and watching her wife walk alone to work in the rain well, Callie wasn't heartless. Hurt. Pained. Mad. Confused, but not heartless._

_Arizona hands Sofia back to Callie. _

Arizona: My cab should be here soon. _(Turning to Sofia_) I'll see you later on little miss.

_As she kisses her daughter goodbye she turns to walk off…_

Callie: Arizona…

_Arizona turns back around. Callie looks at her and then back down to Sofia. _

Callie: Sofia, tell Mama to stop being silly and get in the car.

_Arizona smiles softly, but shakes her head._

Arizona: It's fine, Callie. I'm sure the cab's just running late.

Callie: Sofia's driving…I bought her that car seat with the steering wheel..she loves it.

Arizona: Well, that I got to see.

_Arizona follows them out to the garage. Realizing that Callie was probably doing this because she didn't want feel guilty all day. Not being able to drive put Callie in the driver seat after the crash. And Callie hated driving, mainly because Arizona was a terrible backseat driver. She hated not having control behind the wheel and that was even before the plane crash.. But now she really had no choice. Callie was in the driver seat for the last four months and Arizona criticized her driving all the time, how she was driving too fast or too slow, how she wasn't driving defensively or not driving cautiously enough. Any wrong turn was her fault, any missed sign or signal was her fault. Yet, Callie took the blame and kept on driving. Just like she did in their relationship. _

_How Callie didn't throw her out the window was now baffling Arizona as she climbed into the front seat. _

Callie: All right, Sof. Here are your keys. Show Mama what a good driver you are.

_Callie hands her a set of fisher price keys and then gets in the front. _

_Arizona looks back at Sofia and smiles seeing her play with the keys and the steering wheel and then turns back to Callie. _

Arizona: I'm sure she's just as good as her Mami.

_Callie lets out a defensive little laugh. _

Callie: Oh, so a person who should never be behind a wheel? Or "driving miss daisy", I believe that was the last thing you said about my driving ability.

Arizona: Sometimes I call it wrong.

_The phrase doesn't go unnoticed by both women and Arizona didn't even realize its effect until she saw Callie's face change…quickly realizing the air was getting a little too thick in the car…_

Arizona: And you know, spending a few weeks with your life in the hands of moronic cab drivers, well…

Callie: Right. Well, Sofia will make sure you get to your destination safe and sound, Right, Sof?

_Arizona and Callie shared a little smile…Could they keep doing this forever? Speaking through their daughter? _

_Because Callie went back and forth and side to side every time she was in the same room as Arizona, she wanted to grab her and kiss and make her remember what they had and then some days she wanted to throw things at her and yell and curse her out, and sometimes she just wanted to cry and hug her and say nothing. So speaking through Sofia… It's was clearer every day to Callie that she was willing to see just how long she could do it for. _

_As they exit the parking garage they are already immediately stuck in main street traffic. _

Arizona: Crazy, right? How a five-minute walk to work then turns into a twenty-minute drive with traffic due to the rain.

Callie: Yeah. I know.

_Silence has now entered the car. Only the jingles of Sofia's toy keys are heard. _

Callie: So..how's it going with Dr. Weston?

Arizona: It's only been a few sessions, but I think it's helping. It's hard. It's really hard, but a good hard, you know?

_Callie doesn't know. She never really knew how her wife felt about what happened, she knew the pain, she could see it, but she didn't know the emotions or the roots of each emotion that was unleashed on her. She just knew it hurt. _

_Before Callie can muster a response her phone rings. She answers it quickly._

Callie: Hello? Hey! No, no, no, you want to leave it out for a few hours to defrost and then when you get back home you can baste it. Did you get the bread crumbs? Not the ones in the can the ones..yeah, good. Okay. Yeah, I'll walk you through it again later today. Alright, yup, I'm on my way in. See you soon. Bye.

_Callie hangs up and sees that Arizona wants to know who was on the other line, but too afraid to ask. _

Callie: That was Michael. You know, Dr. Parker. I'm helping him become a little savier in the kitchen. He's hopeless.

Arizona: Yeah? He's a nice guy, huh? I haven't really had a chance to work with him yet but..

Callie: Yeah, he is. A great surgeon too, you'll see soon enough I'm sure. He loves pediatrics, great with kids.

Arizona: Hmm, is he married? Have kids?

Callie: Divorced and no.

_Arizona has seen over the last few weeks how close Michael and Callie were getting. She remembers how he held Callie at Richard's funeral, she notices the jokes, the banter and smiles they share in the hallways of the Hospital. She has even seen them share a few lunches together in cafeteria. Did it bother her? Hell yes. Did she have a right to voice that? No she didn't. See? Therapy was working…but to be safe, Arizona needed to change the topic soon and fast. _

Arizona: So I hear Meredith is coming back to work today. Why someone wouldn't want to take the full maternity leave is beyond me.

Callie: I know right …and I thought with Richard and everything she would have taken even more time, but then again, that's Meredith. She just sort of charges on, you know?

Arizona: Yeah.

_They sit in silence for the remainder of the traffic ride and finally pull into the parking lot of the Hospital. They both turn back to find a sleeping Sofia. _

Callie: Well, that was bound to happen.

Arizona: A fifteen minute car ride and it's lights out?

Callie: She didn't really sleep well last night.

_Callie turns back around and sighs loudly. _

Callie: She hasn't really been sleeping well for me at all most nights.

Arizona: Oh, really?

Callie: You know, her usual wake up in the middle of the night tantrums? I can't get her back to sleep. And I try everything. Everything. The only way she eventually goes back to sleep is after hours and hours of screaming and crying.. at that point she's so exhausted she just sort of passes out. By the time I get back to sleep it's time to get up again and well, you're going to need to tell me what you do, what 's the trick? It was cute before when you wouldn't tell me how you did it, that you were just the better Mom with super magic powers. But now it's my sanity we are talking about, so you need to tell me!

_Arizona chuckles a little bit at the very "callie-like" rant. And then she sees the desperation in her wife's eyes, she sees the lack of sleep, the tiredness. Callie deserves some peace and if Arizona can help even in the smallest of ways, she damn well is going to.._

Callie: Please, Arizona. I need to know or else I'm never going to sleep again. And I miss sleep. I _need_ sleep.

_Callie then closes eyes in defeat as she rest her head against the leather head rest. It feels so good to just close her eyes for a minute. _

Arizona: She's a mini you.

Callie: (_still with her eyes closed_) Hmm?

_Callie is now listening to the rain hit the car and it's soft and calming, she could fall asleep right now… _

Arizona: She's just like her Mami.

_Arizona takes this moment to take in the soft features of her wife's face. With Callie's eyes still closed Arizona takes the chance to scoot a little closer to her, she can smell the coconut shampoo of her wife and it smells like …. Like home. _

Callie: (_still with eyes closed, she mumbles_) No, she gets to sleep all day and I have to go be all "bad ass" and it took all the energy I have to drive us here.

_Callie takes a longer sigh and tires to pry her eyes open but can't just yet. Arizona now scoots even closer over to Callie's side and lowers her voice to a whisper._

Arizona: I just mean that, she's like you in the sense that when you needed to calm down and go to sleep... When all you wanted to do was just quite your mind and rest, I would just…

_Arizona raises her hand slowly and brings it up to Callie's face, she hesitates at first but then can't stop herself, and she softly begins to graze her fingers through Callie's hair, softly massaging her scalp with each slow and tender movement of her fingers. _

_With the rain softly tapping on windows and the pure exhaustion running through Callie's body…she can't help but melt into the feeling_..

Callie: Mmmm.

_She lets out a moan, not caring that it shouldn't have been released, she is beyond tired and even if it's wrong she didn't care about wrong, her wife was soothing her right now and sinking into this tender touch from her wife was all she could do. _

Arizona: See? It quiets you right down and lulls you to sleep.

_Arizona doesn't stop her movements, she can't. This is what she's good at. This is what she knows. This is what feels right to her more than anything in world. Easing her wife, loving her tenderly. _

_Callie sinks further into this feeling, but before she lets sleep really win her over, with her eyes still closed she reaches up to stop Arizona's hand. _

_She then opens her eyes, still keeping Arizona's hand in hers, she looks at her, they are face to face, this is the closest they have been in who knows how long. She takes in the smell of her wife, she takes in the feeling of tender eyes looking deep into hers…_

Callie: Arizona…

_Callie can't look away from the blue orbs that are blinding her as she then finds her lips getting closer and closer to Arizona's… She wants nothing more than to crash her lips back onto the lips that have been her home, her desire, the lips she can't stop dreaming about no matter how hard she tries not to… _

_Arizona feels and thinks that same thing and she goes in slow, heart achingly slow, her lips graze Callie's, so incredibly softly that it feels like air brushing past her lips, but that air is intoxicating, that small light as air graze, is a feeling that sends her pulse racing as she dares to slightly push her lips even closer….._

BUZZzZZZzzzz

_Callie's phone goes off, breaking the trance that Callie was in as she moves her face quickly away from Arizona's and answers the phone. _

Callie: (_Clearing her throat_) Yeah? Hey. No, just.. would you just forget about the freaking chicken!

_Arizona takes a much needed breath and tries to gather herself as Callie continues to fumble her way through the phone conversation and out of the car as she opens her car door. _

Callie: (_still into her phone_) Sorry, sorry, just..we'll deal with it later, I have to go.

_Callie hangs up as she opens the back seat door. Avoiding any kind of eye contact with Arizona. _

Callie: Come on Sofia, wake up baby girl. Mama and I have to go into work now. Come on, sweetie.

_Sophia wakes, a little cranky of course, but Callie is willing to take her cranky and all as long as Sophia is up, she can continue to talk through her because she doesn't know what to say to Arizona about what just happened or almost happened and by the look on Arizona's face as the blonde opens the other side of the back seat door, she doesn't know what to say either. _

Arizona: Come on big girl. Let's go. You can nap again once we are inside.

_Both woman are now fumbling with the car seat and mumbling to Sofia or maybe to each other, at this point they don't really know… _

Arizona: Okay. Yeah. It's okay.

Callie: Yup. Come on. We're good.

_Sofia is released from the car seat and Callie scoops her up. _

_Both women take a deep breath and finally look at one another for a second._

Arizona: Okay?

Callie: Let's just go.

_Callie takes Sofia and rushes through the rain heading toward the double doors of the Hospital. Arizona, still a few steps behind them, but maybe not miles and miles away after all._


	4. Chapter 4

Dr. Weston's Office.

_Arizona is still breathless and out of sorts from what happened or almost happened in the car just moments ago. _

Dr. Weston: Okay, so let's just start with what your feelings are right now, you seem anxious to let something out.

Arizona: I kissed Callie. Well, we almost kissed. We barely did, but that barley there kiss..it was.. it felt..

Dr. Weston: Okay slow down take a breath.

_Arizona takes a minute closes her eyes and releases a deep breath._

Dr. Weston: Good. Okay. Now, go on.

Arizona: We haven't had that kind of moment since the crash, since the leg. We haven't just slowed down for minute and let the rain fall and breathe in and out together and just be…Every movement with us was always so planned, so thought out or so bold and always scary and unsure. But today in the car, it was easy, it was simple and quiet and tender…and it wasn't forced or rushed. I saw my wife, my tired and exhausted wife just needing me, her wife, to ease her, to comfort her softly and it was the simplest of moments and it was …it felt like the first time I was seeing my wife since the plane crash and it felt like for the first time that I knew I was her wife…. Does that make sense?

Dr. Weston: Does it make sense to you?

Arizona: It does. Or it did up until the moment the phone rang and we got out of the car and the rain hit my face and I realized that I screwed everything up. I can't go back and undo every terrible thing I said to her, I can't ask her to forget about the words and the times I looked at her with pure evil coming out of me, I can't ask her to forget about the fact that I slept with another woman. I can't just be her wife soothing her in the car and go from there. We've gone too far. I've pushed us too far.

Dr. Weston: And…

_Dr. Weston knows there is more for Arizona to explore, she knows that there is more she is feeling on the subject… _

Arizona: And I still can't forget about that fact that I still blame her. I wish I didn't. I want to learn how to not blame her for the leg. It's not her fault. I know that. Medically and logically I know it's not. But how come my head and heart won't let that be?

Dr. Weston: That's what we're going to work on. And like I said before, before we focus on Callie's placement in your emotions involving the leg and the plane crash we have dive into how you feel, what you Arizona experienced out there and what you go through everyday with your emotions, not how you handled your emotions with Callie. How you handle your emotions about all of that with yourself.

Arizona: I know. I know. But today I almost kissed my wife. And it felt like home. Like I was home for just once second and that second was …was everything.

**Hospital Café **

_Callie is downing coffee as Michael refills her cup._

Callie: And then you called me about the freaking chicken!

Michael: Sorry, I didn't know what I was interrupting. Besides you didn't have to pick up.

Callie: No, I'm glad you called.

Michael: So did you end up kissing her? Or what?

Callie: No. No it was a graze of kiss, the softest most …ah! Of course I wanted to kiss her. The problem isn't me wanting to kiss her. The problem is her kissing other women, sleeping with other women!

Michael: Right.

Callie: And it was raining… And No, I can't let one almost kiss make me forget that. And I don't forget and I don't know if I ever will. And it was raining and I'm so utterly exhausted and she was doing that thing where she runs her fingers so soft through my hair… and it was raining..

Michael: Yeah I get it was raining. Still is, just so you know.

Callie: Urgh! I'm just saying it was a perfect moment. I would have wanted to kiss anyone. I would have kissed you!

Michael: Oh gee thanks.

Callie: But no…I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her so badly it hurts all the time, everyday, but what hurts more is knowing why I can't, why I don't think I can ever let her in again.

Michael: Callie, it's only been what? Three weeks or so … you need time. This isn't something you're going to know everyday how you feel about. You two are parents together, you live next door, there is always going to be moments like this, it's always going to be raining. We live in Seattle for christs sakes! You just need to ..I don't know..

Callie: Sleep. I need to sleep.

_Callie folds her arms and places them on the table in front of her and lets her head fall down. _

Michael: Yeah, you do. I can't believe you got someone to almost kiss you looking like this.

_Callie lifts her head to give him a evil glare._

Callie: Oh gee thanks.

_Michael fills up another cup of coffee for Callie and glides it to her. _

Michael: You love her.

_She takes the cup and a sip. _

Callie: Yes.

Michael: She hurt you.

Callie: Yes.

Michael: Today, that's all you need to know.

Callie: I've known that for three weeks. How is this helping? You suck at this counseling thing.

Michael: I'm not a psychologist. I'm a surgeon. We go on facts and instinct. We base our plan on results and research. The facts are you love her and she hurt you. And in three weeks time that is still the only facts we are certain of. So more research needs to be had before we can even begin to get in there and start the repair. We got to see more, we need to know more about what we are working with.

Callie: So what do you prescribe for the time being Doctor?

Michael: You can't keep avoiding her anymore, here or at home. You can't keep talking through Sofia or using her as this buffer. You need to talk to her and not about what days you both are on or off work.. like talking, talking.

Callie: I'm not sure we can do that yet. I'm not sure I can do that yet without yelling and crying. I'm tired. I'm so tired.

Michael: Then okay. That's another fact we got and we need to really consider this one. You need to take care of you. You have been taking care of her from the moment she got back from Idaho. You've been a full time caregiver and mother for the last five months. You need give yourself some love and attention, some rest and peace.

Callie: Mmm. Now that's sound more like it. How do I get that, what's the doctor's remedy for that?

Michael: Home cooked meal by yours truly. Yeah, I'll come over and cook the dinner you have walked me through twice now and we'll eat. I'll clean the dishes. I'll watch Sofia. You can take a long bath or shower or whatever and then you can sleep.

Callie: Hmmm. Sleep. You got yourself a deal!

_Callie puts down her cup and sticks out her hand to shake on it. _

Michael: Not a deal, Doctors orders.

_Michael swipes the rest of her coffee as he winks and walks off. _

**Hospital Lobby – Hour later.**

_Callie's surgery has been cancelled. The patient sadly took a turn for the worst and exposing the patient to surgery would only further harm the patient than help at this point. So, Callie was heading home, dragging her tired body and her still cranky but thankfully sleepy daughter back home. _

_As the elevator doors open to the lobby floor Callie steps out of the elevator only to bump right into – Arizona. _

Callie: Oh, hey sorry.

Arizona: No, It's okay. So um, what happened? I thought..

Callie: Surgery got cancelled so.. Um, what about you? You all done for the day?

Arizona: Um, yeah. I just went upstairs and checked on a few patients, but yeah I'm heading home.

_They walk slowly towards the double doors. Arizona knows what Callie is thinking._

Arizona: Don't worry I can take a cab this time. It's fine ,really.

_Callie takes a deep breath and stares out at the rain and then back at Arizona_.

Callie: It's still raining.

Arizona: It's Seattle.

_They share a smile. Callie looks down at Sofia who is sleeping in her carrier. She won't be able to talk through her now. _

_And then it dawns on her. Arizona could drive. She just never wanted to get behind the wheel again with Callie since the car crash. She put Callie in the drivers seat so if anything were to happen again she would be the one to blame. She wouldn't be the one who wasn't paying attention. She then used her leg as further reasons that driving just wasn't for her anymore_.

_So Callie tossed Arizona the keys and stated to walk off, saying over her shoulder._

Callie: You drive.

_Putting Arizona in the drivers seat, even if it was only for a five-minute drive, traffic allowing. It was still further research in seeing just what else she was working with. Her Doctor would be so proud._


	5. Chapter 5

_The drive home was quick and silent. Arizona was nervous being behind the wheel for the fist time in so long; Callie didn't want to distract her with any sort of chatter. Thankfully, due to no traffic, the ride literally took about 3 and a half minutes in total. But for those few minutes, although slightly terrified. Arizona was is in the driver's seat and before she had any time to really think about how it felt; they were already pulling in the parking spot at home._

Callie: So?

_Callie turns to her as Arizona puts the car in park._

Arizona: Thank you. I didn't think… I wasn't sure I would ever..

Callie: See? Now you don't have to rely on moronic cab drivers anymore… or me, for that matter.

_That last part came out a little colder than Callie intended, but then again it was the truth. And maybe Callie didn't push her to drive sooner because in a way she liked that her wife needed her, feeling needed by Arizona was really the only connection that Callie had most days with her wife after the crash. But Callie wants to let go of the needs. Because she didn't want the conclusion of this research to simply conclude that her wife needed her, she wanted to know if her wife still wanted her. _

Arizona: Yeah, I guess so.

Callie: Yeah.

_They exit the car and head in the apartment complex. Walking out of the elevator and onto their now shared floor…Arizona breaks the walk of silence. _

Arizona: How about I take Sofia until I have to go to work tonight? You can catch up on some sleep?

_Suddenly the flash of the almost kiss this morning, sends Callie into a nervous mumble. _

Callie: Um, yeah..that'd be great actually, thanks.

_Callie hands her daughter over and gives her a kiss goodbye and whispers to her softly as the little one is still half asleep. _

Callie: See you tonight, Sof. Love you.

_Callie looks back up at Arizona, they stand awkwardly for a minute. _

Arizona: Drop her off around 8? I'll have her fed.

Callie: Okay. 8 it is.

_Callie turns to walk away.._

Arizona: Callie…about this morning…

Callie: Arizona. I need to sleep.

_Callie was too tired and so not ready to have any discussion about the almost kiss that wasn't. Arizona actually didn't know what she was going to say about the almost kiss either…she just wanted to make sure she wasn't dreaming it. _

Arizona: Okay. See you at 8.

**7:45pm **

_Callie had slept most of the day and finally felt like a person again. She had slept well and she had showered and she even took some time to do her hair and put on make-up. She slipped on pair of tight jeans and black loose top, she felt good. _

_So now, as she is watching Michael, who at the moment was doing a terrible job at this so-called home cooked meal. She felt a little bit like her old self again and she was more than ready to take charge in the kitchen. _

Callie: So you know, a real home-cooked meal would mean that you actually made it at your home and brought it to me.

Michael: But then you'd miss out on the aroma's of the meal being made.

Callie: Currently, I smell the aroma of burnt chicken and I could do without it.

Michael: Ha. Ha. Fine. You're clearly well slept and ready to get in here. I know it must be killing you to just sit by and watch this disaster. So come on, show me how it's done.

_Callie puts down the glass of wine she was drinking and motions up off the couch to head into the kitchen. But, she stops for a second and turns around and heads over to the stereo. _

_She goes over and hits play as the upbeat tempo of some new age song fills the room, Callie smiles brightly and sashays back over to the kitchen. _

Callie: Music! God, when did I stop playing music?

_Michael doesn't know the answer so he just shrugs, looking at Callie to answer that one for herself. _

Callie: I used to play music in the OR all the time and in the kitchen.

_Callie moves Michael over and away from the skillet and beings to take over the meal. Michael moves willingly and picks up his glass of wine and leans over the counter and just watches Callie do her thing. _

Callie: There will be more music in my life. Let there be music! And cooking! And… and Dancing!

Michael: You dance?

Callie: Ha! Do I dance. I got moves. I got a ton of moves. Damn good, sexy moves.

Michael: Alright.

_Michael chuckles and takes Callie in as she starts swaying to the beat, while stirring away at the bowl on the stove. She is beautiful. Any person within a twenty-mile radius could see her beauty. Michael shakes his head bashfully. _

Michael: I can't dance. Two left feet.

Callie: Everyone can dance. You just need to find your beat, your rhythm.

Michael: Trust me. I can't dance. It's been tested and proven multiple times. My ex-wife would actually ask me to not get out on the dance floor so she wouldn't have to watch in embarrassment.

Callie: Then she isn't a true dancer. A true lover of music, such as myself knows that anyone can dance. You see, I can dance great to anything, any beat…

Michael: Cocky much?

Callie: Confident.

_As the word came out of her mouth, she realized she didn't know the last time she actually felt confident. Damn, it felt good. _

Callie: I bet that you never even tired to find your beat. You probably just listened to whatever she liked. So…let me guess… she was a country pop kind of girl?

Michael: Impressive. Yeah she was. Dragged me to every countryfest concert, it was pure hell.

Callie: And you…

_Callie takes a swig of wine, puts the glass down and turns the gas low on the stove as she moves around the counter…Keeping one eye closed to concentrate a little harder as she looks Michael up and down… _

Callie: Jazz! You're so Jazz aren't you?

Michael: Michael Myles Parker. Myles Davis was my parent's favorite singer.

Callie: God, I'm am good. And you're in luck…

_She gives Michael a little nudge to the shoulder as she walks by him and heads back over the stereo to pick up a CD. _

Callie: Myles Davis is my Dad's all time go to music of choice.

Michael: Wise man.

_Callie puts in the CD, hits play and as the jazz percussion comes through the stereo, she turns back around to Michael with a smile, she takes in his smile and then it hits her how incredible attractive this man is. I mean, she knew that when she first met him, but so much of their time spent together was about her talking about Arizona, that sometimes she would forget that this man she was talking to, this man she was getting to know her better than anyone has in a long time.. well, he was strikingly handsome._

_Callie shakes the thought and focuses on the music, As does Michael as he timidly starts to sway back and forth. _

Michael: See? Terrible.

Callie: No, not terrible. Just a little robotic.

_Callie extends her hands and arms and Michael enters into her dancing space. Callie then puts her hands on his hips and sways him to the beat.._

Callie: Just go with it… don't judge it, don't question. Just move when you feel like moving.

_They are now swaying in together. Michael puts his hands on her lower back and embraces her movements. _

_Outside the Apartment. Arizona has Sofia in her arms as she knocks on the door. _

_She waits for minute, puts her ear closer to the door, hearing the music, she figures Callie must not hear the knocking, so she reaches for the keys and opens to door and sees the scene in front of her. _

_Callie is dancing with Michael. Closely. Too close. _

_Then she sees Callie throwing her head back and laughing and smiling with Michael. When Sofia hears her mothers laugh she starts to laugh and squeal herself. _

_Callie and Michael both hear the squeal…they both turn to see Arizona looking rather stunned and pissed off. They stop moving and break apart. Arizona puts her head down and mumbles._

Arizona: Sorry to interrupt. But it's 8.

_Callie adjusts her clothes and Michael turns back around and heads to the stove. Callie walks over to Arizona to take Sofia. _

Callie: Sorry, I didn't hear you come in. You could have rang the doorbell.

Arizona: Um, I didn't think you would hear it over the music.

_Arizona states that coldly as Callie takes Sofia in her arms._

_ Arizona finally raises her head, they lock eyes. Callie knows Arizona is upset and bothered by what she walked in on. But Callie was having fun. Innocent fun. She was allowed, wasn't she? She shouldn't have to feel like she needs to apologize. _

Callie: Arizona…

Arizona: What?

_Arizona barks back, and then puts her head down in a sort of defeated way. Arizona doesn't have the right to be jealous or bothered or upset that her wife was having fun, was dancing. In fact, a part of her was sort of happy to see her wife enjoying herself. She couldn't remember the last time she saw Callie dancing around to music. _

_Callie is starting to feel bad and feel sad for Arizona, she wishes she could just stay mad, but…urgh! it was so confusing. _

Callie: Um, there's food, if you had some time you could have some..

Arizona: I already ate with Sofia, besides I wouldn't want to intrude.

_Arizona looks over at Michael who is doing a terrible job of trying to make himself look like he knows what he is doing in the kitchen. Callie follows her gaze and sees Michael trying to fiddle with the stove. _

Callie: See? He's hopeless.

_Arizona was trying her best to keep her feelings in check, but knowing that Callie and Michael have gotten close and that his closeness has now led them to home cooking dates and dancing in the living room … well, she couldn't check all her emotions at once so a little harshness was bound to come out. _

Arizona: I thought you were just helping him cook, I didn't know you were giving him dance lessons too.

Callie: Arizona…come on.. I..

Arizona: Whatever, Have fun.

Arizona quickly leaves, she forgets to even kiss Sofia goodbye, because she's too full of emotions that she doesn't know how to deal with. Callie felt the coldness hit her as Arizona quickly turns away and that just pissed her the hell off, she slams the door behind shut and turns back to Michael.

Callie: Have fun?

Michael: What did you really expect her say?

_Callie doesn't know and she can't deal with what Arizona is thinking and feeling right now, she just wants to …well.. _

Callie: Have fun! We are going to have fun! Come on Sofia! Let's dance!

_Callie takes her now giggling and giddy daughter out into the dance floor, well the small barely their living room, as Michael just watches the scene before him and smiles. _

_A few hours later, dinner was had and Sofia was sound asleep in her room and Callie and Michael were finishing off another bottle of wine… Well, Callie was._

Michael: I can't believe you lived the hospital?

Callie: Not as some homeless person, I was hardcore. I didn't want to miss out on any surgeries. Come on, you know what fourth year is like, you have to be cut throat.

Michael: Yeah, but I mean, that's just another level. That's kind of your thing, huh? Everything with you is always at another level.

Callie: I'm going to take that as a compliment.

Michael: Yeah, no. I'm just saying, it's never dull with you, Callie.

Callie: Yeah, well - stick around.

_Callie goes to add more wine to her glass, she offers the bottle to Michael?_

Michael: I'm still on call, remember? One glass limit, but thanks.

Callie: Yeah. I should probably call it quits too it's getting late.

_Callie sets down her now full glass down on the table and moves to grab the empty dishes in front of them. _

Michael: No, I said I'd do the dishes.

_Michael now reaches over, putting his hands over Callie's to stop her, but she tugs back. _

Callie: No, it's fine really…

_Michael again tugs her hands down trying to make her release the plates._

Michael: No, I'm a man of my word and..

_Callie tugs back again harder, but this time she knocks over the wine glass and all of the wine spills all over the front of Michael's shirt…_

Callie: Oh, see? Look what you made me do!

Michael: Argh, Crap.

_Callie goes to wipe the counter down and get a towel for Michael, as a BUZZzzzZZzz is heard._

_Michael looks down at his pager._

Michael: Ah, Crap, Crap! That's me, the patient from this afternoon. I got to go.

_Michael tries to dry himself off with the towel and realizes it's not going to cut it._

Michael: You have a shirt or scrub top or something? I don't think showing up drenched in wine is a good look to sport when talking to the patient's family about the life threatening surgery I'm about to perform on their son.

Callie: Right, I think I got a big scrub top from when I was pregnant that could fit you…?

Michael: Sure, whatever. Just get it fast will ya?

_Callie grabs the baby monitor and runs into the bedroom, it's a mess, clothes are everywhere. A mess is what she had been living in since everything with her and Arizona..she is rifling through a another big pile, it's going to be like finding a needle in a haystack. _

_Michael now pokes his head in the bedroom._

Michael: Sometime today Callie…

_Michael's phone now rings. He goes to answer it while backing out of the bedroom and heading closer and closer to the front door to leave…_

Michael: (into the phone) Yeah, no I'm coming. I'm only about 5 mins away so, yes exactly, exactly, work to stabilize the patient as best you can, I'm heading out the door now…

_Callie finally locates the scrub top and rushes over to the front door that Michael has now heading out of, not caring about being shirtless in the hallway, he is too consumed on the phone call._

Michael: (still into the phone) No! No! You _do not_ make that call, you hear me!

_Callie hand him the scrub top, he struggles to put it on in the hallway, while holding the phone, Callie tries to help him as best she can. _

Michael: No! You don't touch the patient again until I get there!

_Michael shakes his head in frustration, but now successfully clothed he throws Callie a soft smile and mouths a "thank you" as he gives her a kiss on the cheek. _

_When did they become people who say goodbye like that? They both didn't know and didn't have time to care.. Michael heads off down the hallway._

_And that's when Callie sees Arizona standing stunned by her door that she has been to stunned stiff to open yet as she still hold her keys in her hand with one hand on her doorknob. _

_Michael walks past her still on the phone and still in a hurry. _

Michael: Dr. Robbins.

_Arizona doesn't look at him as he passes her and get on the elevator to leave. Her blue eyes are still burning into Callie's._

Arizona: That didn't take long.

_Arizona opens her door and slams it shut behind her. _

_Callie is pissed! Arizona doesn't get to judge her, even if she does think that Callie just slept with Michael. She doesn't get to be pissed and slam doors, She doesn't get to hurt and make Callie feel like some cheating whore! _

_Callie rushes back into her apartment and grabs a set of keys and still with baby monitor in hand she marches right over to Arizona's door, unlocks it. Enters and slams it behind her._

Callie: No! No! You do not get to judge me! You don't -

_Arizona now throws down her bag and keys and turns around to face Callie._

Arizona: You know what? I'm glad! I really am! At least now one score is finally settled between us!

Callie: Oh you would love that wouldn't you! But you see, I still have both my legs! So even if I did sleep with him, it wouldn't change that fact, that I still didn't lose ANYTHING, right! RIGHT?

Arizona: Please, Callie. You were always so quick to run into the arms of the nearest man! Why the hell wouldn't I think you slept with him, I mean he's pretty much Mark reincarnated!

Callie: Oh, don't even.

Arizona: Don't even what? It's fine Callie. You can sleep with whomever the hell you want to!

Callie: You're damn right I can!

_Callie is about to turn and leave not wanting to screaming match to continue any longer, but they always end their fights quickly without really going there…and they needed to go there… because almost kisses in the rain couldn't turn into kisses if they both didn't go there and strangely among the yelling and the tears that were sure to follow, they both deep down knew this.._

_So Callie turns back around and fires back with.. _

Callie: But you know what the really messed up freaking part is? That I actually only want to sleep with YOU! YOU! My wife! My cheating - hurtful - forever blaming me – WIFE! But she doesn't want to sleep with ME! Hell, she made me wait FIVE months for her to let me even touch her, but it took all of TWO days for her to jump in the sack with Dr. Bitchwell!

_Arizona takes the hit and yells back loudly with.. _

Arizona: Because she didn't force me!

_Arizona's yell and words hit Callie like a bullet to the chest and the shots kept coming. _

Arizona:…She didn't push me into doing things and feeling things I wasn't ready to feel yet! She didn't make me feel guilty all the time for not being my perky self! She made me laugh and she made me feel sexy because.. because…

_Arizona now starts crying and chocking on her tears and sobs.. but still forcefully fighting these words out for Callie to hear. _

Arizona: Because she never saw me at my worst, she didn't pick me up out of a pool of my own urine! She didn't see me struggle to get up in the morning. She didn't give me " I feel bad for you eyes" when I couldn't run around with my daughter.

_Arizona now chokes back the tears and turns her rage back on full blast, rage for herself, rage for Callie, rage for all of it. _

Arizona: And she didn't ask me if it was okay to touch me! She didn't hesitate or feel unsure! She just did it!

_Callie was still standing but wounded by the words, the truth was now beginning to bleed out of both of them._

Callie: Of course she just did it! Because all she saw was this sexy, confident and apparently not so happily and in love married surgeon. She didn't know about the other side of you. About how just as easily as you can brighten any room, you can also darken it in ways I never thought possible. How that perky little mouth of yours can send the most hurtful words into someone's heart. How you can go from begging me to never leave you, to throwing me out of my own bedroom. How you could go from loving me better than anyone ever has, to hurting me in ways no one has ever hurt me before…

_Callie is now sobbing out loud and uncontrollably. The same way she had that day in the shower. Only this time there was no wall to hold her up and she looks like she is about to topple over._

_Arizona goes over to her and doesn't think, she just takes her into her arms and holds her…they both let the cries and sobs come out as they fall into each others arms. _

_A few minutes of getting there sobs and cries under control, they pull away from each other, having or not knowing if there is anything else to say… _

_..and then another cry comes out, only this time it's through the baby monitor that Callie is still holding._

_Callie chokes back a few more tears and takes a deep breath in to raise her chest up and turns to walk out the door._

Arizona: Callie..

Arizona whispers out, but Callie doesn't turn back around. She slowly reaches the door, turns the knob to open it and says…

Callie: I can handle it without you now, Arizona.

_And shuts the door behind her. _

Both women won't realize it tonight or maybe even tomorrow or the next day, but when Arizona goes to see Dr. Weston and tells her of this fight and when Callie calls Michael tomorrow and tells him the same…they will both discover that even as much as it hurts, that this was progress and much like any other open wound that both of them have suffered in their lives….there is always a few more rounds of pain before the real healing can ever begin.


	6. Chapter 6

_It had been three weeks since that last fight. And both women went back to not talking to each other unless it was about Sofia and most of the conversation was now through texting, _

_When they did find themselves forced to be face to face, they always both kept it quick and to the point. _

_This didn't mean that either of them weren't sill processing or dealing with their emotions. Arizona was still making serious strides in therapy and Callie was taking her Doctor's Orders about taking her care of herself very seriously. _

_She had finally been able to make Mark's apartment more of a home for herself and Sofia. She had even been working out more and hanging out with friends and being more of her bad ass self at work. _

_They were both separately healing wounds that only they could heal for themselves. But the words and emotions that had been exchanged from that last fight were not forgotten, it still kept them up at night, it still hurt, but the pain they were no longer wearing on their sleeves, but to anyone that really knew each women it was apparent the pain was still there in their hearts. _

**Hospital Café – Day**

_Christina flops down in a chair in front of both Michael and Callie who are enjoying lunch together. Christina takes in the pair for a minute and then glares hard at Michael… _

Michael: Dr. Yang, can we help you with something?

_She takes one last long hard stare and then says…_

Christina: McScruff. McScruffy?

Michael: Um, what?

Christina: McScruff. Yeah, McScruff works.

Michael: (_whispers to Callie next to him_) Is she telling me I should shave?

Callie: No, she's McNicknaming you – it's her thing, don't worry, it actually means she likes you, she only McNickname's people she likes, right Yang?

_Christina just shrugs._

Christina: So, I assume as Godmother, I actually have to attend this thing Friday night?

Callie: What thing Friday night?

_Christina takes out a pink and shiny looking invitation card and hands it over to Callie._

Callie: You got to be kidding me?

Michael: Hey! I didn't get one.

Christina: Sorry, McScruff, but anyone who looks at Callie's boobs all day, probably doesn't get invited to Arizona's birthday party for Sofia.

Michael: Hey!

Callie: Christina!

Christina: I know! It's Crazy! I look at them too, but Arizona knows I'm not a lady lover.

_Callie is no longer listening to Christina's nonsense; she is just staring down at the invitation in disbelief. _

Callie: How could she have not told me that she was throwing Sofia a party? We talked about this, we agreed that we were just going to throw a little party in the daycare with all of Sof's little friends….

Christina: Welp, she invited all of us, well except McSruff here. And although none of us have really talked to her since she got all "roller girl scandalous", it does say that a magician is coming… and apparently Zola is on this magic kick and well, Derek and Mer are pumped about it too. It's all kinds of sad, you parent type people are a strange bunch.

Michael: And you're the definition of normal, Yang?

_Michael laughs at his own joke and turns to Callie to see the steam coming out of her ears._

Michael: Callie, calm down okay, it's fine, you're still going to have the daycare party and it's all going to be..

Callie: No. No! No, she's not going to parent one up me! She's doesn't get to invite my friends! My friends! To some super magic birthday extravaganza and act like she's this.. this.. good person. She's not a good person!

_Callie yells that last part a little too loud, but she can't care …she gets up in a huff and a rage and quickly exits the café. _

**Attending Lounge – Moments later**

_Callie swings open the door and throws the invitation down on the table in front of Arizona, who putting some final touches on another invitation. _

Callie: What the hell is this!

Arizona: Oh, Callie. This one is yours. I gave you the one with extra glitter.

Callie: You got to be kidding me?

Arizona: No really, yours is way more sparkly.

_The old Arizona is shinning through her eyes and coming out of her mouth as she says that last part….it threw Callie off for a second, but only a second - she is still enraged. _

Callie: I thought we agreed that the daycare party would be fine.

Arizona: It is fine. It's great! I just wanted to do something a little extra.

Callie: Extra? You got a magician! You can't just…do this and..

Arizona: I can do this. I'm her mother too, Callie. And I want to do this, not just for Sofia. I mean, she's turning 4 years old! 4 years old, Callie. And the reason she gets to see birthday after birthday is because of our friends, who fought right by her side as she was fighting for her life and..

_Callie can't believe what she is hearing and she starts shaking her head._

Callie: No, no. Don't even try. Don't even think for one second that you have me fooled. This party isn't about Sofia – it's about you!

Arizona: Excuse me?

Callie: Yeah, you think if you throw this "pretty in pink magician party", that you can fool everyone into thinking that you're the same super awesome perky woman that they all used to know and hope that they just forget about the fact that you…

Arizona: You are so off base!

Callie: I don't think I am! These people are _my friends_. You may have survived a plane crash with them, but I saw them through residency. I was one of Christina's bridesmaids when she married Burke. You don't even know who the hell Burke is! I spent every morning for three months helping Meredith pass her boards, I'm the reason Derek can even operate again! The only reason you know where these people live to send them an invitation is because I allowed you into _my_ life.

Arizona: Is that really what you think? You think I'm trying to steal away your friends? I want to throw a party for my daughter and I want to include the people who are important to her life. Be them "your friends" or mine.

_Arizona can't believe how junior high this conversation was starting to get. _

Arizona: God Callie, I know it's easy for you to just paint me as the villain all the time…

Callie: Well, you're certainly not a damsel in distress.

_Arizona didn't want to start another fight, not another fight. So she takes a breath and continues softer. _

Arizona: I thought it would be something fun. I didn't want to bother you with all the planning; I wanted to surprise both you and Sofia. I wanted to do this for you and for her. So please..

_Arizona picks up the invitation that Callie still hasn't taken and gives it to her. Callie takes it. _

Arizona:…please come.

_Arizona leaves the lounge and shuts the door behind her. Callie thinks for a minute and takes another look at the invitation. It has Arizona written all over it. Sparkling with glitter and little butterflies, just like the ones on her scrub cap, just like ones Callie used to get in her stomach anytime Arizona use to enter the room. Butterflies. They are what Callie prayed to get over so she could ask out the pretty perky blonde. Yup, this invitation had Arizona written all over it, well the old Arizona that she feel in love with. Was Arizona inviting her into her again? And if that was the case, does she want to accept it? ….._

_Michael and Callie are scrubbing out of surgery talking about how they both just rocked that case..they are heading out of the double doors as they pass by Arizona - who is putting on her scrub cap and clearly off to the OR. _

_Yup, the scrub cap with the butterflies. _

_Callie pretends to not see her and continues looking ahead as she passes them. _

Michael: So?

Callie: What?

Michael: Don't _what_ me? It insults me that you think I don't speak "Callie" fluently by now.

_Can he? Callie didn't give it too much thought - she had other things on the brain. _

Callie: I'm not going to her little super glitter party. She can't just throw glitter and butterflies around and act like she is some big super Mom all the sudden.

Michael: I really don't think that's what she's…

Callie: No, what I am going to do is throw a super magic party of my own. Yup, same time, same address,… just different apartment number.

_They reach the elevator. Callie hits the button and waits impatiently. _

Michael: And telling you this is a terrible childish idea isn't going to stop you, is it?

Callie: It's a party for a child. Why not act appropriately?

Michael: So Sophia is now going to have three parties all in the same day?

Callie: I'm sorry, have you not seen how incredibility adorable my little girl is? She should have party every freaking minute of the day.

Michael: But this isn't about Sophia. You get that ,right?

Callie: No, it's all about Sofia. Because she was my dream. My dream! And they are _my friends_ and this is _my life_ and I'm not going to stand by and let her keep coming back into it and ruining it!

_DING! The elevator opens and reveals Karev, who is looking down at the invitation in his hand and then he looks up to see Callie._

Callie: Oh, _you _are so going to go to hers, aren't you? Of course you are! You're her "boy"!

Karev: Um…

Callie: Fine! Go! Go to hers, but just remember Karev… before you were so far up her ass - you groped mine.

_Callie and a confused, but amused Michael - get on the elevator. _

_And as the door closes she adds.._

Callie: And you liked it. A lot!

_The door closes and Michael just can't get over Callie and how she is acting. _

Michael: What the hell was that?

_Callie just shrugs and keeps her game face on. _

Callie: Whatever. My party is going to kick her party's ass.

**Next Chapter it's Party Time – who wants to come and who's do you want to go to? **


End file.
